Teaching Kids about Faith and Death

Kids ask anything, and everything. It is sometimes exhausting to answer all their questions, that I usually end up and is also guilty of saying, 'You'll understand it more when you grow up'. As much as I want to explain everything, one answer leads to another question, and another, and another. Questions such as 'Why is Jesus dead?', 'Is Jesus dead?', "Who is God?", 'Where does a baby come from?', "Where is Granny 1 (my mother) and why did she die?' have been asked to me by my eldest daughter. It was not easy for me to answer her because I do not even know how to simplify the answer. 

A few months ago, in a book sale, I found this book that costs less than a hundred. The title of the book is I Know He Is There. The book aims to teach kids about faith. It became handy for me because I usually end up explaining questions about faith and death through this book. The main point of this book is that as long as a child believes in something, it is still present in his heart even if he doesn't see it. Below is an excerpt: 

  'When I fold my arms, and bow my head to pray, I can't see Heavenly Father, but I know He is there.

   I can't hear Him, but I know He hears me thanking Him for all my blessings.

   I can't see Him, but I know He sees me, and watches over me.

    I can't touch Him, but I know He is there....'

Written by: Rebecca Gundersen Thornley

Sibling Rivalry

Source: yummymummyclub.ca

Having 3 kids is fun but crazy. There's shouting, crying, fighting, and more almost everyday. It's not really difficult to calm a crying child when he hurts himself. It's a greater challenge when more than one child cries because he's fighting with another sibling. The University of Michigan Health System defines Sibling Rivalry as 'jealousy, competition and fighting between brothers and sisters'. It is true that it is one of the most common challenges of being a parent. There are even countless articles on how to address it. Each parent has his own style in handling this when tension happens. What I am going to discuss will include real situations and how I have tried my best to resolve them.

1. Sister A tells me, 'Mama, i love you' then hugs me. Sister B upon seeing it walks out and goes to the corner of the room almost crying.

What I did: I called on Sister B, talked to her, and assured her that I love her too. I then told her that we love each one of them, and that she has nothing to feel sad about.

--I think kids have a tendency to feel sad and be left out when they see one of their siblings express gratitude or love towards one parent. Kids' emotions are usually seen as shallow, but parents should not ignore this. Kids are very sensitive. They have this constant yearning for love, and as parents, it should be our top priority to make them feel loved and appreciated.

2. Sister A and B fight over shoe color. Mama bought shoes for the 2, pink for Sister A and blue for Sister B. Sister B wants the pink one, but the size doesn't fit her. She cries and gets mad.

What I did: Since I couldn't really exchange the shoe colors because of the shoe size, I just let Sister B cry until she stopped. I put the shoes back in the box, talked to her and told her the many beautiful things that are also color blue. Next thing I noticed, she was wearing the shoes already.

--Kids have a tendency to not listen sometimes no matter how hard things are explained to them. In addition, even if a parent tries his best to keep his cool, it will not be enough in the end. I believe that kids should be allowed to cry at their hearts' content. They will eventually get tired anyway:) After that, they are more willing to listen.

3.  Sister A is busy drawing and Sister B wants to join. Then Sister A shouts at Sister B so that the latter will stop bothering her, and this makes Sister B cry.

What I did: I told Sister A that what she did is wrong and asked her to apologize to her sister. I told her to talk properly to her sister and should not shout at any of her siblings. I then told the other kid to also apologize to Sister A for bothering her, and to look for another toy that she could be busy with.

--Kids also want their privacy to be respected. It's wasn't easy to apprehend Sister A because she was just busy and quiet all along. But the fact that she shouted at her sister didn't spare her from being scolded. 

4. Sister B is busy playing with a toy and Brother A, upon seeing it, gets excited and suddenly grabs the toy. Sister B tries her best not to let go of the toy and this made her brother cry.

What I did: I talked to the little boy and told him to get another toy. He's in a stage where he wants to get anything he likes. This happens most of the times. I sometimes let my boy get what he wants, but when I say no, it's final. I just let him cry.

--Fighting over a toy is one of the most common reasons why siblings fight. I experience it everyday, and honestly, I'm beginning to get used to it. I try my best to be patient as possible, to be calm, even if I'm bombarded with other responsibilities at home. In the end, I just explain things to them and let them be emotional about it. Maybe they'll cry for 5 minutes or even more, and again, I will just let them. I've realized that if I will always give in with what they want, what will happen when they grow up?

Parents should never get tired of explaining things to their children. Time is really the most precious gift to give them. When we listen and talk to them, we are already making most of our time for them. Even at our busiest, let's make it a point to be with them at their happiest and most emotional/loudest crying moments. Kids grow up fast and I'm happy that i'm not missing anything so far:)

The Sweetest Things

I appreciate thoughtfulness a lot. I have always expected my husband to be thoughtful, but of course, he's the complete opposite. But I still love him anyway. I have realized that love isn't always about giving in to what others expect of you. Over the past few days, upon my conversations with different people, all of them have told me how lucky I am to have my husband. As I pondered on these, I've realized that I have failed and ignored what has been in front of me for a long time--I have married a very loving husband.

Below are some of the great things he has done for me. Sharing love and good vibes to all, please read on:

1. When I was pregnant with our first child, he took it upon himself to assist me in anyway that he can to accomplish what I needed to do before my comprehensive exams. He talked to the professors and borrowed books on my behalf. Even going to school with me and waiting for me inside the library.

2. He made sandwiches for me. He would wake up early in the morning to give me my 'baon' for work. 

3. He would make my coffee and prepare my breakfast. As I always have succeeding classes, he would make sure that I would be able to grab my favorite mug while working.

4. He would take his day off even if it was not really his day off. When I go out with friends, he would not go to work, and he would look after the kids. He allows me because he knows how difficult it is to just stay home and do everything.

5. He would cook for me. I remember craving for 'guinataan halu-halo'. He bought all that he needed for it and cooked with gusto. 

more soon:)

What I Need to Do

Christmas is fast approaching. When one has kids, it becomes the most anticipated event of the year. I now have this sense of urgency to plan something special for the kids. They're expecting Santa Claus to come for their gifts. And somehow I've realized to do these things soon:

1. Decorate the house. We only have a small Christmas tree, but despite that, I think I should add more decorations for the home. Kids are happy to see decors in different forms and colors. I am actually thinking of DIY project for the kids. Sounds exciting.

2. De-clutter. I think one of the most important things to do before the holidays is to get rid of clutter. Kids will soon have new toys and books, and old toys will soon be ignored. Easier said than done! But i'll try:)

3. Prioritize. It's cliche to include 'SAVE UP' in my list. During Christmas, expenses double and no matter how hard we compute it, it'll end up most probably negative. I think parents should learn to prioritize. It is already a given for kids to ask for anything they want, plus the fact that we also want something for the house or for ourselves. Nevertheless, I think prioritizing what we need to buy over what we like or want for now would make a big difference in our wallets.

What are your plans for the coming weeks? Goodluck!

I Need a Lift

What make a person happy? We are happy because of our family, career, money, friends, etc. Definitely a lot of answers, right? However, let's admit it that there are days when we feel down. Life isn't fair after all. So what do you do to put a smile on your face? Below are some of the simple things that I do to get that needed lift.

1. Christmas songs. While writing this article, I am listening to a medley of Christmas songs because it lifts my mood. I get to sing along with it. It reminds me of good memories and love. Some may even agree that a Christmas song brings a positive vibe. It brings the warmth of close family relationships and friendships.

2. 'I love yous'. After a day or even in the middle of doing a chore, I usually get stressed to the point of crying. An example would be cleaning and arranging my living room so that I could comfortably sit on, but then kids start to disarrange everything again and turns the room into a mess. What follows would most probably be a shouting/scolding parent and kids who'd just run around and ignore me. I experience that every day. It gets quite tiring and depressing but when a kid suddenly hugs you and says 'I love you', the anger just disappears like nothing happened. Same thing happens when I just cook the food they like or give them their favorite juices. Kids have this unexplained source of charm that turns everything positive.

3. Writing. There's something therapeutic about it. I used to have a lot of journals before, but for some reason, I have lost it, or maybe I should just do some thorough cleaning of the house soon. One of the main reasons why I write is because I want my children to be reminded of the lessons that I want to instill in them. When kids are too young, they have many questions. Even if a parent tries his best to answer them, kids may not still understand them. One of the first things I've written about in my new journal is about my career path.

4. Conversations. Isn't uplifting when you have that one person who'll listen to you without judging you? When I recently had a falling out with a friend, I really felt bad about it. My husband was there to listen to me, I think that was just enough to make me feel better.

Safety at Home

Parents will always protect their children. Having three kids meant divided time and attention. However, I make sure that I don't compromise their safety. But then there are days when we, parents, thought we've done our best to guard our children. When I recently encountered an 'unsafe entity' outside my house, I became disappointed with myself. I even asked myself, 'why wasn't I able to stop it?'. I got depressed and just kept on blaming myself. After that, life moves on and I didn't have any choice but to protect them even more. Here's what I do to ensure safety at home:

1. I don't sleep. Yes, I still watch my children sleep. Ever since I started having a child, I was deprived of sleep. I only have an average of 5 hours of sleep everyday. I seldom have naps, but when I do, it's just for 20 minutes. One will never know when trouble comes, so I choose to be awake.

2. I lock the doors and the gate. Strangers, sometimes, have their own creative ways of letting themselves in other people's houses. I make sure I lock the gate of my house all day. It prevents my kids from going out. I still allow them to run around outside, but not all the time.

3. I set rules. I always remind my kids of the rules that I always want them to remember. They should be inside the house at 5pm. They should inform me of anything suspicious. They should not talk or go with other children to other places. Yes, a lot of 'shoulds'. But despite that, I make sure I explain everything to them.

4. I trust my kids. Although I set a lot of rules at home, I sometimes allow my kids to do what they want, checking whether they apply my reminders or not. I want to give them a little independence and a sense of responsibility. I want to see if they will still do the right thing even if I'm not looking.

5. I talk to my kids. One of the most important things in a child-parent relationship is communication. Kids have a lot of questions in their minds, specially when there are rules and limitations to adhere to. One of the best thing a parent can do is to spare time explaining what might happen if their kids break the rules. Also, be honest to your kids, so that they would reciprocate. Do not sugar coat things to the point of missing out on reality. Remember, when your kids grow up, the lessons you taught them will make them ready to face the world.

REVIEW: Unionbank Dasmarinas, Cavite

My Unionbank Eon will expire in a few days, so I've got to replace it in time for my salary at the end of the month. At 9am on the dot, the Unionbank branch in Dasmarinas, Cavite opened up. Here are some things I've noticed:

1. Their bank employees, including the guard, do not know how to greet customers. Courtesy is very important because the life of their business depends on the customers.

2. My transaction only took 15 minutes. Kinda quick but it would have been quicker if the person in charge in handling new accounts did not include her other responsibilities not related to my purpose. She said she'd just open the vault. I went there to change my Eon card, so no connection at all.

3. I paid P150 for the replacement of my Eon card. I've read in numerous blogs that a fee is paid for the replacement. Apparently, there is no payment if the card has reached beyond its expiration date. For example, if my card expires at the end of August and I decide to replace it by September, there would be no charge for replacing it. It would have been better if the bank's website includes that information.

More observations next week as my card will be replaced after a week.

REVIEW: Sky Ranch

Last August 23, our whole family decided to celebrate my father's 70th birthday at Sky Ranch. It is located beside Taal Vista in Tagaytay. Buses going to Nasugbu, Batangas pass by it, and jeepneys from Tagaytay Rotunda are another option. Below are my negative and positive observations:

1. Their entrance is 80 pesos during weekends. I find it misleading because when I told the cashier that we have a senior citizen, she said that the entrance of my father will still be 80 pesos because it is already discounted. According to her, the entrance is really 100. I think that is a lame excuse not to give a senior citizen discount. So it appears that regardless of a guest's age, the entrance would still be P80.

2. Even if it's sunny or drizzling, the ride attendants are always ready to use their big umbrellas for those who will be taking their rides. 

3. Children below a certain height has a free entrance. However, I ended up paying for my 3-year old daughter's rides because the cashier said she isn't free. When my brother-in-law asked, he was told that a child who has a free entrance can also avail of free rides all throughout. How confusing!

4. It's nice to see that there are now benches around. When my friends and I first visited, we were just standing around.

My kids enjoyed their time at Sky Ranch. Aside from the entrance and price issues, the place is clean and the attendants are nice.

What I Am Proud Of

I've been a little depressed these past weeks, but suddenly had a change of perspective. The sudden change was unexplainable. So I would like to write about what I am proud of. This article includes my big and not-so-big accomplishments as a wife and mother. Happy reading!

1.I am proud of witnessing my children's milestones. 

When a mother works outside, she misses a lot. Although the work contributed by women nowadays are given more worth compared before, nothing beats seeing your child's first smile or first step. I had a child one after another, but despite that, I never missed any of their milestones. It never stops to make me smile when I think about them.

2. I am proud of knowing my husband more.

I always tell my husband that our relationship is tested by distance. In the 9 years that we have been together as a couple, 3 years of that, he stayed in Japan, 1 year he stayed in Qatar, he goes home only twice a week because his work is in Makati, and going home everything would exhaust his time, money and energy. I admit that even when we got married, we still didn't know a lot about each other. Our relationship grew as we were blessed with more children. That meant having a limited time with only the two of us. Both of us exerted a lot of effort to make each other feel special. It was a challenge at first but we were able to surpass it. Yes, it was difficult but worth it.

3. I am proud of my work.

When I was studying my master's degree in UP, I was ashamed of my job. Whenever I was asked what my job is, I would get blank stares from others. I felt that other people think my work wasn't that serious to be considered a career. I guess partly true. I've been working as an ESL teacher since 2005. Ever since quitting my job in 2009 and becoming a housewife after, I was left with no choice but to look for a job that would be easy to do at home. Still, ESL teaching came as a good opportunity. I am more proud of it now because I do not need to leave my house but still get a salary that is the same as those working outside.

4. I am proud of my little home.

I could still remember the time when I was questioned why I bought and used my husband's money for a 26.8 studio unit. I could still remember my mother-in-law's reaction upon seeing the unit, looking a for staircase (of course there was no staircase!). They made me feel I just wasted a lot of money for a small property. I had to let it all pass at that time. I am vindicated now. That small house witnessed my family's struggles and happiness for 4 years. 

5. I am proud of being a housewife.

Being a housewife and accepting that I have become a housewife were both difficult in the beginning. It was sad comparing myself to my peers and seeing how successful they have become in their chosen fields. I remembered saying that I wanted to be a housewife, but I wasn't ready with the responsibilities included. God listened to what I wanted to become and everything changed. It was disappointing at first. Doing everything on my own and still taking care of the children after was physically, mentally, and emotionally draining. But I have gotten used to it and couldn't last a day not doing a task for any of my family. 

6. I am proud of my children.

Last, but definitely not the least. I love my children so much because they complete me. They're like ordinary kids, but they're special to me. They are different in their own ways. They have their own strengths and shortcomings. They make me cry and they make me smile. When I look at them, I always think they're still babies. Even if I had a lot of difficult time taking care of them when they were smaller, I don't want them to grow up fast. 

What's Happening To Me?

dreamstime.com

I've been excited about so many things. From a whining person a month ago, something strange happened, and things are becoming clearer. I recently realized the value of having an insurance. I'm a person who's afraid of dying. I don't want my kids to suffer what my sisters and I have experienced when our mother died. We were left with a million worth of debt, unpaid mortgages, credit cards, etc. My poor father have to shoulder everything. I used to blame my mother for what we have to go through after her death. Our lives were changed, every member in the family was affected. These past few days have made me realized how bad I was to blame my dead mother for our financial problems. I suddenly realized that she was not financially literate. She didn't realize the importance of investing when she was still alive. I still love her despite what happened. Somehow, things would have been better if we knew people who could give a good influence about money.

Last weekend, I met two different agents. Both were knowledgeable about their products. Agent 1 started discussing about my finances and what could be left after deducting expenses from our salaries. Agent 2 started discussing about the background of the company. Agent was straightforward in what she could offer. Agent 2 provided me with enough information about the different technical terms associated with finances. For the value of a VUL worth 350k, Agent 1's quarterly premium is double of Agent 2's. I still have to research on their respective products. I asked for a month to think about it before making a decision.

Aside from being more financially-concerned and interested these days, I also decided to change my hair color. Being a housewife has decreased my confidence. I lost interest in going out and learning new things. I became content with my kids and what I need to do at home. I somehow lost my motivation to grow and learn as an individual. Parenthood has put me in a cage where everything I do becomes a chore. I love what I do for my husband and kids, but somehow, I lost 'it'. And so I decided to change something about myself.

To end this, I just want to say that I started to think of the future because I was holding on so long to the past. Change is good.

notbuyinganything.blogspot.com

My Typical Day

                                           Source: imnmarketer.com

What is your typical day like? As a mother of 3 kids, with no nanny, and a lot of house chores to do, I end up lacking energy all the time. Did I mention that I also work? I have realized that ever since I had a child, I have never had a complete 8-hour sleep. I could only have at most 5 hours of sleep everyday. Let me give you a list of what goes on everyday.

4:15am -Wake up and prepare for my 4:30am class
4:30am-6:20am- Online classes
6:20-6:40am- Prepare kirsten for school
6:40-7:00- Breakfast
7-7:40- Do laundry
7:40-7:50- Bathe kurt
7:50-8:00- Prepare for a one-hour online class, do the dishes, etc
8:00-9:00 Online classes
9:00-9:40 Prepare kylie for school, do the laundry in between, prepare what will be cooked for lunch
9:40-10:00 Send kylie to school, fetch kirsten *with kurt in tow
10:00-10:20 Check kirsten's homeworks, check for subjects to review, do the laundry
10:20-11:30 Prepare and cook lunch, wait for kylie to arrive, put kurt for a nap
11:30-12:00 Lunch, do the dishes, etc.
3:00-5:00pm Clean the house, do more dishes, review the kids' lessons, prepare and cook dinner
5:30 Dinner
6:00-6:30 Bathe the kids
from 7:00pm Check my night classes, emails, writing jobs
7:30 Put the kids to sleep
9:00-10:00pm Online classes
----------------------------------------------------------

I could only take a nap in the afternoon, but most of the times I couldn't because I got used to watching them sleep. I would often complain about this schedule but I am more than thankful for the physical and emotional strength everyday. I also break down in tears sometimes, specially when kids become uncontrollable and they just won't listen. I've thought before of going back to work outside, but just an hour of being away and not seeing my kids become unbearable already. I've learned to appreciate the hardship of doing everything everyday and find something positive about it. The kids' smiles, words of appreciation and warm hugs compensate for everything.

7 New Faces in 7 Days

                                                         Source: cavendishimaging.com
I am slowly becoming a fan of Solar News Channel because of their shows. 'Undercover Boss' is my favorite show, because it features how bosses are willing to go undercover to know the problem and issues of their own companies, deal with the employees who serve as the backbone of their companies, and later on uncover their real identities to these people and reward them in the end. Last Saturday, as I was channel surfing, I chanced upon 'Stories', a documentary show on the Solar News Channel. The story that night was about how a group of UK doctors went to Vietnam, more specifically Danang Hospital, to help those who have facial deformities. The medical team will only be staying in Vietnam for 7 days and they need to help 7 patients with serious facial deformities. The challenge for these doctors was choosing who to help among the many number of patients expecting to be cured. I never knew that many people in Vietnam have facial deformities. They have, i think, one of the highest number of people with birth defects. The lack of medical help and equipment have forced these same people to just accept their fate. What made it worse was poverty. It made me feel very lucky and sad at the same time. Lucky because no one in my family has a similar problem. Sad because the usual problems of not having money and not getting the right medical help are forcing these people to accept their situation. What impressed me in the end was the idea of bringing 3 patients to London for their operation and treatment. 

The viewer will, in the beginning, be saddened by the plight of these patients. Making one realize that, in our society, we still laugh upon those who do not look 'normal' or 'acceptable' based on what most of us have made standards. That even if we have started to accept black as beautiful, we are not still ready to accept those whose faces are deformed. That even if most of us say that we put no discrimination on people on wheelchairs, we still pass them in elevators, and some companies still do not employ them. Despite these realizations, one compelling lesson is unforgettable all throughout: that one should not lose hope even if the odds may go against him most of the times. 

Have a long distance relationship?

A long distance relationship is never easy, but if I'd be given a chance to do it all over again, I would. I met my husband in 2004 and he also left before the year ended. You see, we met in March and he left November. He came back after three years, to be exact, November 2007. During the 3 years, we relied on yahoo messenger, numerous phone calls and letters. Well, during the entire 3 years, I only received 1 letter from him. Despite that, I never grew tired of writing him, and sending him letters 3 times a month. I remember I would frequently go to the Post Office inside the University of the Philippines. Yes, those were the days. It was very difficult because it seemed back then that I had an imaginary boyfriend. It was hard to cling to promises. What made it harder was the fact that we were just in the beginning of our relationship when he left, just 6 months. It was a risk. There were times when I had to initiate breakups, but he never said 'yes'. Sure there were disagreements, but they were signs of how we miss each other.

                                                             Source: fitting-it-all-in.com

I think most long distance relationships fail because couples can't stand not seeing each other, as if the presence of each other is the only thing that will make their relationship stronger. It's true that physical presence is important, but when you enter a long distance relationship, you have to look for other ways to compensate physical absence. I still didn't know how I did it, or how I surpassed it. Maybe I just grew tired of not seeing him anymore. I made a conscious effort of writing him, almost everyday. I was not able to send the other letters that I wrote him, but writing to him seemed like I was writing in my diary during those days. It became a habit. And that habit beat the idea of not seeing him.

When someone decides to pursue a long distance relationship, be prepared to get hurt and don't expect a lot. Always consider what is important for each other. You have your own priorities when you're apart. Do not expect the other person to give in to your demands all the time. Remember, both of you have your own lives, your own responsibilities to fulfill and goals to pursue, Be understanding. Be prepared to understand even if it seems difficult to do so. During those 3 years, he was working for his family and I was pursuing my studies. We both have different priorities, but we never considered the difference as a hindrance to our relationship. Though there were times that I wished he was with me during special occasions, we had to let them all pass because there are more important things to focus on.

The question: 'Do I want to lose this person?' is something that I end up asking myself after thinking of how difficult it is to be in a long distance relationship. When I thought I could not wait anymore and got tired of waiting for phone calls and messages, I ask myself this question. The answer was always a 'no'. Most couples lose their faith in each other during long distance relationships. Time and distance will always pose a challenge in what you have and in what you have built together, but I guess the idea of losing each other would change everything and turn what you have in its original place. 

I've always believed that 'Patience is a virtue'. Do not be tired of waiting.

Customer Service Experience from Jollibee: Pass or Fail?

I recently availed of Jollibee's 45-minute delivery. I usually call them twice a month specially when I feel like rewarding my kids from being behaved and obedient. You see, my kids' faces lighten up when I order from them. I also do this when I can't cook anymore because of my hectic schedule. Talking to their customer service for order taking only takes 2 or 3 minutes, and then after that, the 45-minute wait begins. However, our food arrived an hour later. Jollibee promises P200-worth of gift certificates if they failed to bring the food on time. Since my food arrived late, I expected to get the gift certificates (GCs). However, the rider told me that the 45-minute rule starts when they, the riders, leave the store. I told him that I clarified that to the customer service already. But he still didn't give me the GCs. He even told me that the P200 value of the GCs will be deducted to their salaries. I think he said that to make me feel guilty. So I asked him to sign at the back of the receipt with the delivery time included. I told him that I'd be waiting for their call to address the problem. After he left, I called and clarified the information. I didn't wait for the call from the store manager because I'm not really sure if the rider would talk about my complaint to the manager. The customer service that I first talked to transferred my call to their supervisor. She was a bit surprised of the information that the rider gave me. She told me that she will verify the reason about the problem to the Manager-on-duty of that particular Jollibee store. She even told me that their company would never deduct from the employees salary. After a few minutes, she called me back to once again apologize about what had happened and assured me that proper information will be disseminated next time to the employees. And yes, she told me that the GCs will be delivered to me before the day ends:)

How to make a child ready for school

                                                             Source: pyambr.com

A child is no longer a baby when he/she starts schooling. I have two preschool girls that just started their classes last week. The eldest's schedule is from 7:00am-10:00am, while the other is from 10:00am-12:00nn. I consider myself lucky because my kids never cried or threw a tantrum on their first day of school. I guess it is still normal for kids to be fearful of a new environment, specially on their own. This is why I understand the difficulty of other parents and children who cry in schools. My kids have already adjusted to their morning schedule. They usually wake up at around 5:00am because of my work, have breakfast, brush teeth and take a bath. It's been a breeze so far because I remind them every night of what they should do in the morning. These are only some of the reasons why I think my children are ready for school. Let me share more of my observations:

1. Kids should be taught how to be responsible.

Going to school for the first time is a big adjustment for both parents and children. In my case, early on, I've been constantly reminding my children that since we have no helper to depend on, they have got to understand the importance of being responsible. It's not an easy task in the beginning. There even came a point when I have to keep on repeating my reminders everyday, getting blank reactions from them. Others may think that I may be expecting a lot from my kids, but I have always believed how kids are intelligent in understanding and seeing the difficulties around them. 

2. Kids should be taught the value of time.

It is never easy to wake up in the morning, specially for kids. Kids love to play even until way past their bedtimes. However, it is important for parents to instill the importance of time and being on time by cultivating the things that their kids need to do during specific times of the day. When a child gets used to doing something on a regular basis, it becomes a habit. Later on, the child would then initiate doing what he needs to do even if he is not reminded. 

3, Kids should be taught the value of learning.

Kids are naturally inquisitive. They may ask anything they see on tv, outside of their houses, or just anything in their wonderful minds. I believe that learning should be nurtured more by giving utmost attention to our children. When we listen to them, they feel that they are given importance. Whatever their stories may be, their little minds really have a lot going inside. When kids are exposed to songs, nursery rhymes, reading and playing, parents may discuss how similar activities can also be experienced in school, with new found friends. With this, a kid understands that similar activities are not only confined to the colorful walls of their houses, but can also be enjoyed in schools.

How was your child's first day of school?:)

Comelec Registration Procedure

It is not my first time to vote, but because I didn't vote for two consecutive elections, my name was erased from the database of voters. Presidential elections will be on May 2016. However, the Commission on Elections has started its registration last May 6, 2014 until October 2015. Filipinos are once again called upon to exercise their right to vote.  Last May 7, I went to the COMELEC office at the municipal hall of our town. Since I have not voted for a long time and has never received a voter's ID, below were my concerns:

1. My name was not in the database of qualified voters in the Comelec website.

2. I transferred to a different municipality.

3. I want to use my married name for registration

The Comelec website contains a lot of information related to my concerns. So before going to the office, I brought all my IDs, and other documents like marriage and birth certificates. This is to make sure that I will not be going back and forth to their office. Upon arriving at the Comelec office, I was asked to photocopy a valid ID. After that I was asked the last time I voted and my complete name. My record was then checked and it appeared that, it is true, I am not in their records anymore. I was, then, given a registration form that I need to complete in three copies. After that, the form was checked to see if I missed out in answering any part. The biometrics, which included all the necessary information in the form and my fingerprints, were saved. I was then given the stub that I need to show the Comelec officer so that I could vote on election day. The whole process took me 30 minutes. I arrived at their office at around 9:30am.

Tip: Read the Comelec website first before going to their offices for registration. Do not expect that a voter's ID will be given immediately after. I was told that I have to wait for more than three years before I could get mine.

My Lap-Chole Experience

                                                            source: drahmadmd.com

Last April 3, 2014, I underwent a procedure called "Laparascopic Cholecystectomy". The main aim of the procedure is to remove gall bladder stones by inserting a camera through the four holes made in one's abdomen. I discovered I have gall stones when I felt a sharp pain in my stomach while standing up, that was just last March. I thought I was going to die as I have never had any other surgery except for my c-sections. A day after I felt the pain, my sister advised me to see a surgeon because she thought I maybe having appendicitis. However, the abdominal ultrasound showed that I have a lot of small gall stones that might go through the small ducts and reach my other organs. It was hard to accept at first, because what came into my mind was my kids. Again, I thought I would not be seeing them grow up. Fear has already enveloped my mind and body. But I have realized that it still depends on how I am going to face the situation. What I did was to do online research about 'cholecystectomy' and pray. The procedure itself was a bit painful. The most painful part was the anesthesia. Two weeks after the pain, I underwent the surgery. Fast forward to the week after, I was already dining out with my friends in a buffet restaurant, lol! Many thanks to my family and friends, most specially to my husband, who was there all throughout.

With a history of cancer and heart ailments in the family, it's impossible for me not to worry about my health and my children's. Honestly, before the surgery, I worry about it everyday. I have realized that because of my worries, I have missed a lot in appreciating my health more. So the idea now is to enjoy the present and pray for my worries. 

The Joys of Raising Children

Who doesn't love kids? If there's one thing I learned from having a family, it's the happiness brought by raising children. I got pregnant almost every two years. Sure there were regrets that I am not really ashamed to admit, but love blossoms when you bear a child. I now have a 5 year old, a 4 and a 1 year old. I don't have a nanny also. When I see news about children being maltreated by people you thought you could trust, it breaks my heart. Even if I wanted to pursue a career outside my home, I have begun to accept that raising my children is now my career. Here are some things I have learned so far:

1. Children are different from each other. It is a challenge not to compare kids. But I think that there will always come a time that comparisons will be made. My husband and I discuss our children by ourselves, making sure that the kids would not be hearing anything. Yes, we compare, but we make sure that we put utmost attention to the behavior/characteristic that needs improving.

2. Children are intelligent individuals. I have noticed and learned that the approach to learning should be adjusted on the needs of the kids.One child may require a lot of information and explaining to do when he/she asks a question,while the other may not. Kids ask the simplest question and a parent's job is to answer it as truthfully as he/she can.

3. Children needs attention. In my case, the challenge happens when one kid after another demands attention. Sometimes, one kid asks a question, while another tries to tell a story, while another starts to cry because he hurts himself. It's crazy and fun at the same time. It is the parents' responsibility to give attention to the children. They feel loved and appreciated by the acceptance and approval they get from their parents.

4. Polite words matter a lot. Kids do and say silly things. However, it is always up to the parents on how their children will grow up. Teaching words of politeness is my priority at home. I've always believed that polite words hone a person's character and it will always be seen on how he/she deals with people until he/she grows up.

5. Discipline with love. With three children and a never-ending pile of housework to finish, I always end up getting easily irritated by mess and fighting. I do 'face the wall' or 'time-out' strategies to make kids understand what they've done. However, I always see to it to explain to them the mistake they have done. It's true that sometimes they are too young to understand, but the hugging and apologies that comes after are what usually makes my heart melt.

Jan 27th

When death strikes in a family, everything falls apart. I lost my mother from cancer. It was a Monday, 6:00 a.m, also my sister's birthday, January 27. It was the most painful and unforgettable experience for me. I still remember even the littlest detail on that day. I felt lost and alone. I tried to convince myself that she just went abroad and was never heard from again. Tough times. I decided to quit my job because I couldn't bear the pain and I realized that the only way for me to accept everything is to just do nothing. Even if I have tried my best to move on, it seemed the most difficult thing to do. 11 years later, I am still trying to rebuild myself. I have tried my best to be a good mother and wife,so that she could be proud of me. I am trying to be the mother that she wasn't. Yes, the opposite. My sisters and I grew up not receiving all that love and guidance that most mothers give to their children. This pain never leaves me and I promised myself that I would not be doing the same mistake to my children.