Mga Tanong ng Bata, atbp.

   Mabilis lumaki ang mga bata. Pahirap ng pahirap ang mga tanong nila. Sana nga math problem na lang ang pinapa-solve sa akin, baka kayanin ko pa. Pero nitong mga nagdaang mga araw, nagugulat ako dahil madalas, hindi ko alam kung paano uumpisahang sagutin ang mga tanong nila. Akala ko na kapag nasa ganoong sitwasyon na ang isang magulang, madali na dapat sagutin. Hindi pala. Minsan, hindi lang mga tanong nila ang dapat mahirap sagutin, pati yung mga katuwiran nila. Sa totoo lang, napapaisip na lang ako bigla, sabay sabi sa sarili na, 'oo nga no'.

1. Tanong: 'Bakit kailangang maniwala kay God?'

    Kumakain kame nito ng hapunan at ang panganay ko ang nagtanong. Sa totoo lang, nagulat ako at nagmadali mag-isip ng sagot. Ayoko kase isipin ng anak ko na ang tagal kong sumagot at baka bigla na lang syang hindi na magka-interes dito. Ayokong ring mahalata niya na nahihirapan ako, hahaha.

    Sagot: 'Kailangang maniwala kay God kase ito ang 'mag-guide' sa behavior at actions mo sa buhay. Kung wala kang paniniwalaan, kanino ka maniniwala, sa ibang tao?' 

2. Sitwasyon: Tinuturuan ko ang pangalawa kong anak tungkol sa mga kulay. Sa libro, tinanong ko sa kanya ang kulay ng abokado. Sabi niya, 'violet'. Sabi ko, 'pwedeng green o brown'. Kase sa totoo lang, nalito rin ako, hahaha. 

3. Tanong: 'Paano kinukuha ang baby sa tiyan pag nanganganak?'

  Eto, hirap na hirap ako dito. Dahil talagang sinabi ko sa anak ko mula ng saksakan ako ng anesthesia hanggang sa paggising ko. Di naman niya sinabi sa akin na di niya naintindihan, pero di na sya nag-'follow-up question'. Hahaha.

4. Tanong: 'Saan galing ang mga regalo ni Santa Claus?'

    Eto talaga, sinabi ko ang totoo. Ang mga regalo ni Santa Claus ay galing sa mga magulang, ninong at ninang, hahaha. Na ang totoong Santa Claus ay nasa North Pole 'ata', ang yung mga napapanood sa tv ay kathang-isip lamang. 

5. Tanong: 'Bakit naghihiwalay ang mag-asawa?'

    Sinabi ko sa anak ko na nangyayari yun kapag di na masolusyonan ang pag-aaway at mas marami pang dahilan. Sabi ko magpasalamat sya na wala kame sa ganuong sitwasyon at totoong nangyayari yuon sa ibang tao.

    Sinusubukan kong hindi magsinungaling sa mga anak ko kase ayokong magkaroon sila ng perpektong ideya sa mga nasa paligid nila. Marami pang susunod. Salamat.

    

On Getting Married...Again

One January morning, over a cup of coffee, my husband and I decided to get married again, but this time in a church. We got married in civil rites in 2009. I thought that was enough. I love attending church weddings because of the solemnity of the event. We didn't get married in church back in 2009 because I didn't want to. The problem has been with me-- I didn't want to prepare because I know how stressful the planning process would be. And so, fast forward to 2015, after realizing the importance of a church wedding and the eagerness of once again professing our vows in front of our family and friends, and, after 6 years and 3 kids, we have decided to have a church wedding on June 12, 2015.   

We initially wanted April 2015 because it summer and we're hoping to hold it in Marinduque. When we had a our family's short vacation there last December, I fell in love with the simplicity and the cleanliness of the environment. However, I've realized the difficulty of travelling back and forth to process and prepare everything. So we decided to hold it in Manila.

The Church: 3 Choices

a. Saint Francis of Assisi in Mandaluyong

b. Pinaglabanan Church in San Juan

c. Annunciation Parish in Cavite

Since I am not based in Manila anymore, I thought that holding the ceremony in the first two churches I have been familiar with would be easy. It wasn't the processing of the documents that became the challenged. It was the fact that my husband and I cannot go out because no one will look after our 3 kids. We realized that we cannot rely on other people to look after them. To solve the problem, we decided to have the wedding instead near our house. The church is just 10 minutes away from our house. On our first visit to inquire about their wedding, we even brought our 3 kids--that somehow made it memorable.

                                                               Annunciation Parish

For the other things to prepare for, I made a list of the most important things in a wedding. Since we're on a budget, we need to value every penny spent. Here's the list:

1. Church

2. Reception

3. Caterer

4. Photography

5. Make-up artist

6. Attire

7. Invitation

8. Souvenir

9. Cake

10. Transportation

Details on the above list will follow:)

The Time I Got Lost

Let me begin by saying that my journey to finding myself is still halfway. I still feel lost sometimes, but not compared before. Why was I lost? I felt that I didn't know what I wanted to do, how I wanted to do things. I am a mother, I have 3 kids, I have a good husband. Maybe you'd ask, 'why should you be lost if you have a happy family?' Good question. The answer: 'I don't know'. 

Was it because of my religion? Am I not praying hard enough? As I began to ask questions, I slowly understood how I was focused more on what I wanted to get, instead of what I was willing to give. I always expect other people to give me something. I was lost because I refused to give a part of me. And with that refusal, I never learned that there was something positive about me. I hated myself a lot of times. I was focused more on what material things I can have to enjoy. Even if I go to church to hear mass, I go just for the sake of doing so, not really for my spiritual development. Maybe, that's why I got lost. I refused to give myself wholeheartedly to God. I refused to believe. Well, I believe, but not a 100%. 

I know it's still a long process. And life has many things to offer. I am more hopeful now. I look forward to better things now. Well, I guess, I'm not really lost anymore, or maybe I just forgot. The unraveling of things in the past months have helped. And with that I was content. 

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