US Embassy Manila Interview

Last February 16, I accompanied my father for his interview at the US Embassy. He is scheduled at 8:30am. Below are some tips:

1. Do not come very early. It is advised that you come at least 15 to 30 minutes before your schedule. Remember, even if the line gets too long, being there at that time of your interview is what matters. Everyone will be accommodated.

2. Senior citizens can be accompanied inside the embassy. Upon presenting the DS-260 and the interview letter, the person at the gate will ask if the person who will be interviewed, specially senior citizens, have someone with them and the reason. Allow the person to be interviewed to answer the reason.

3. Upon arriving outside the embassy, you might be lured at sitting at the available chairs outside. DO NOT. Each one pays P30 for it. I wonder why the police or security guards outside the embassy are not warning the interviewees. Kickback, I guess.

4. Upon arriving at the embassy, there may be some people who will approach you asking if you need assistance. DO NOT entertain them. I saw a man having his photo taken by one of those people. I guess he thought he brought the wrong picture. They charge a lot. I also overheard a man not having a DS-260 and was asked to pay P450 for it.

5. The vendors outside the embassy will act as if giving instructions and reminders to the people in line. Ignore them. If you have any questions, approach a US embassy employee who roams once in awhile to organize the lines. They may seem busy but they respond properly when approached.

6. One DOES NOT need a pen or any writing material inside the embassy. I saw a man being lured to buy a ballpen because he was told by a vendor that sign pens are not accepted inside.

7. DO NOT bring any gadget inside. One will not be allowed to enter. There may be some people outside who will offer their help in safekeeping your gadget. The asking price is P300 up.

8. DO NOT bring food inside. There may be stores inside, but I only saw a donut kiosk.

9. Bring all the necessary document. Do not worry if you do not have the same documents like the other applicants. Remember, each applicant is different. Do not compare your documents, it's not safe.

10. Follow instructions and be attentive.

11. Fall in line all the time. I remember being able to sit only at the last step.

12. Check the embassy website for any advisories or announcements. Come to the interview with the needed information, not only about the possible questions that may be asked of you, but also about the documents that you should bring.

When I became a mom...

1. When I became a mom, I felt more complete. My search for life's meaning led me to a clearer path. Happiness before depended on having material things, spending time with friends, and being able to keep my job. That was before. Now, everything is simple--spending time with the kids, serving them, taking care of them, loving them...

2. When I became a mom, I appreciated my mother more. How I wished she's still alive looking after her grandkids, and somehow telling me that I've been doing the right thing. When I lost my mother, I lost myself. Now, with my kids, everything went into place.

3. When I became a mom, I learned the value of sacrificing. My father has worked for almost 30 years. He left when I was about 2, and I didn't really cared about him when I was growing up. When my mother died, I thought, 'why her?', and now I've found the answer. My father's now 71 and still healthy. His presence has made me realized how important a parent's sacrifice is to his child. It is only then that I felt lucky and how I started to care for what I have now.

4. When I became a mom, I became more concerned with my health. Having three ceasarian operations and a laparascopic cholecystectomy have always left me thinking about my presence for my children. Who will take care of them when I'm gone?

5. When I became a mom, I tried my best to do the right thing in all aspects of life. I do not strive for perfection but I'm trying to be a good example to my kids. It's a continuous struggle.

6. Lastly, when I became a mom, I decided to give my love more without the fear of not being loved in return. Though, I worry about how fast my kids have been growing up, I 've realized that worry is useless. Hence, I must make the most of it. I must give them my time, support, and love.

'A mother's love is infinite, it goes beyond death, it has no limitations. 

A mother's love should not be questioned, should not be forgotten.'

Mga Tanong ng Bata, atbp.

   Mabilis lumaki ang mga bata. Pahirap ng pahirap ang mga tanong nila. Sana nga math problem na lang ang pinapa-solve sa akin, baka kayanin ko pa. Pero nitong mga nagdaang mga araw, nagugulat ako dahil madalas, hindi ko alam kung paano uumpisahang sagutin ang mga tanong nila. Akala ko na kapag nasa ganoong sitwasyon na ang isang magulang, madali na dapat sagutin. Hindi pala. Minsan, hindi lang mga tanong nila ang dapat mahirap sagutin, pati yung mga katuwiran nila. Sa totoo lang, napapaisip na lang ako bigla, sabay sabi sa sarili na, 'oo nga no'.

1. Tanong: 'Bakit kailangang maniwala kay God?'

    Kumakain kame nito ng hapunan at ang panganay ko ang nagtanong. Sa totoo lang, nagulat ako at nagmadali mag-isip ng sagot. Ayoko kase isipin ng anak ko na ang tagal kong sumagot at baka bigla na lang syang hindi na magka-interes dito. Ayokong ring mahalata niya na nahihirapan ako, hahaha.

    Sagot: 'Kailangang maniwala kay God kase ito ang 'mag-guide' sa behavior at actions mo sa buhay. Kung wala kang paniniwalaan, kanino ka maniniwala, sa ibang tao?' 

2. Sitwasyon: Tinuturuan ko ang pangalawa kong anak tungkol sa mga kulay. Sa libro, tinanong ko sa kanya ang kulay ng abokado. Sabi niya, 'violet'. Sabi ko, 'pwedeng green o brown'. Kase sa totoo lang, nalito rin ako, hahaha. 

3. Tanong: 'Paano kinukuha ang baby sa tiyan pag nanganganak?'

  Eto, hirap na hirap ako dito. Dahil talagang sinabi ko sa anak ko mula ng saksakan ako ng anesthesia hanggang sa paggising ko. Di naman niya sinabi sa akin na di niya naintindihan, pero di na sya nag-'follow-up question'. Hahaha.

4. Tanong: 'Saan galing ang mga regalo ni Santa Claus?'

    Eto talaga, sinabi ko ang totoo. Ang mga regalo ni Santa Claus ay galing sa mga magulang, ninong at ninang, hahaha. Na ang totoong Santa Claus ay nasa North Pole 'ata', ang yung mga napapanood sa tv ay kathang-isip lamang. 

5. Tanong: 'Bakit naghihiwalay ang mag-asawa?'

    Sinabi ko sa anak ko na nangyayari yun kapag di na masolusyonan ang pag-aaway at mas marami pang dahilan. Sabi ko magpasalamat sya na wala kame sa ganuong sitwasyon at totoong nangyayari yuon sa ibang tao.

    Sinusubukan kong hindi magsinungaling sa mga anak ko kase ayokong magkaroon sila ng perpektong ideya sa mga nasa paligid nila. Marami pang susunod. Salamat.

    

On Getting Married...Again

One January morning, over a cup of coffee, my husband and I decided to get married again, but this time in a church. We got married in civil rites in 2009. I thought that was enough. I love attending church weddings because of the solemnity of the event. We didn't get married in church back in 2009 because I didn't want to. The problem has been with me-- I didn't want to prepare because I know how stressful the planning process would be. And so, fast forward to 2015, after realizing the importance of a church wedding and the eagerness of once again professing our vows in front of our family and friends, and, after 6 years and 3 kids, we have decided to have a church wedding on June 12, 2015.   

We initially wanted April 2015 because it summer and we're hoping to hold it in Marinduque. When we had a our family's short vacation there last December, I fell in love with the simplicity and the cleanliness of the environment. However, I've realized the difficulty of travelling back and forth to process and prepare everything. So we decided to hold it in Manila.

The Church: 3 Choices

a. Saint Francis of Assisi in Mandaluyong

b. Pinaglabanan Church in San Juan

c. Annunciation Parish in Cavite

Since I am not based in Manila anymore, I thought that holding the ceremony in the first two churches I have been familiar with would be easy. It wasn't the processing of the documents that became the challenged. It was the fact that my husband and I cannot go out because no one will look after our 3 kids. We realized that we cannot rely on other people to look after them. To solve the problem, we decided to have the wedding instead near our house. The church is just 10 minutes away from our house. On our first visit to inquire about their wedding, we even brought our 3 kids--that somehow made it memorable.

                                                               Annunciation Parish

For the other things to prepare for, I made a list of the most important things in a wedding. Since we're on a budget, we need to value every penny spent. Here's the list:

1. Church

2. Reception

3. Caterer

4. Photography

5. Make-up artist

6. Attire

7. Invitation

8. Souvenir

9. Cake

10. Transportation

Details on the above list will follow:)

The Time I Got Lost

Let me begin by saying that my journey to finding myself is still halfway. I still feel lost sometimes, but not compared before. Why was I lost? I felt that I didn't know what I wanted to do, how I wanted to do things. I am a mother, I have 3 kids, I have a good husband. Maybe you'd ask, 'why should you be lost if you have a happy family?' Good question. The answer: 'I don't know'. 

Was it because of my religion? Am I not praying hard enough? As I began to ask questions, I slowly understood how I was focused more on what I wanted to get, instead of what I was willing to give. I always expect other people to give me something. I was lost because I refused to give a part of me. And with that refusal, I never learned that there was something positive about me. I hated myself a lot of times. I was focused more on what material things I can have to enjoy. Even if I go to church to hear mass, I go just for the sake of doing so, not really for my spiritual development. Maybe, that's why I got lost. I refused to give myself wholeheartedly to God. I refused to believe. Well, I believe, but not a 100%. 

I know it's still a long process. And life has many things to offer. I am more hopeful now. I look forward to better things now. Well, I guess, I'm not really lost anymore, or maybe I just forgot. The unraveling of things in the past months have helped. And with that I was content. 

. 

Teaching Kids about Faith and Death

Kids ask anything, and everything. It is sometimes exhausting to answer all their questions, that I usually end up and is also guilty of saying, 'You'll understand it more when you grow up'. As much as I want to explain everything, one answer leads to another question, and another, and another. Questions such as 'Why is Jesus dead?', 'Is Jesus dead?', "Who is God?", 'Where does a baby come from?', "Where is Granny 1 (my mother) and why did she die?' have been asked to me by my eldest daughter. It was not easy for me to answer her because I do not even know how to simplify the answer. 

A few months ago, in a book sale, I found this book that costs less than a hundred. The title of the book is I Know He Is There. The book aims to teach kids about faith. It became handy for me because I usually end up explaining questions about faith and death through this book. The main point of this book is that as long as a child believes in something, it is still present in his heart even if he doesn't see it. Below is an excerpt: 

  'When I fold my arms, and bow my head to pray, I can't see Heavenly Father, but I know He is there.

   I can't hear Him, but I know He hears me thanking Him for all my blessings.

   I can't see Him, but I know He sees me, and watches over me.

    I can't touch Him, but I know He is there....'

Written by: Rebecca Gundersen Thornley

Sibling Rivalry

Source: yummymummyclub.ca

Having 3 kids is fun but crazy. There's shouting, crying, fighting, and more almost everyday. It's not really difficult to calm a crying child when he hurts himself. It's a greater challenge when more than one child cries because he's fighting with another sibling. The University of Michigan Health System defines Sibling Rivalry as 'jealousy, competition and fighting between brothers and sisters'. It is true that it is one of the most common challenges of being a parent. There are even countless articles on how to address it. Each parent has his own style in handling this when tension happens. What I am going to discuss will include real situations and how I have tried my best to resolve them.

1. Sister A tells me, 'Mama, i love you' then hugs me. Sister B upon seeing it walks out and goes to the corner of the room almost crying.

What I did: I called on Sister B, talked to her, and assured her that I love her too. I then told her that we love each one of them, and that she has nothing to feel sad about.

--I think kids have a tendency to feel sad and be left out when they see one of their siblings express gratitude or love towards one parent. Kids' emotions are usually seen as shallow, but parents should not ignore this. Kids are very sensitive. They have this constant yearning for love, and as parents, it should be our top priority to make them feel loved and appreciated.

2. Sister A and B fight over shoe color. Mama bought shoes for the 2, pink for Sister A and blue for Sister B. Sister B wants the pink one, but the size doesn't fit her. She cries and gets mad.

What I did: Since I couldn't really exchange the shoe colors because of the shoe size, I just let Sister B cry until she stopped. I put the shoes back in the box, talked to her and told her the many beautiful things that are also color blue. Next thing I noticed, she was wearing the shoes already.

--Kids have a tendency to not listen sometimes no matter how hard things are explained to them. In addition, even if a parent tries his best to keep his cool, it will not be enough in the end. I believe that kids should be allowed to cry at their hearts' content. They will eventually get tired anyway:) After that, they are more willing to listen.

3.  Sister A is busy drawing and Sister B wants to join. Then Sister A shouts at Sister B so that the latter will stop bothering her, and this makes Sister B cry.

What I did: I told Sister A that what she did is wrong and asked her to apologize to her sister. I told her to talk properly to her sister and should not shout at any of her siblings. I then told the other kid to also apologize to Sister A for bothering her, and to look for another toy that she could be busy with.

--Kids also want their privacy to be respected. It's wasn't easy to apprehend Sister A because she was just busy and quiet all along. But the fact that she shouted at her sister didn't spare her from being scolded. 

4. Sister B is busy playing with a toy and Brother A, upon seeing it, gets excited and suddenly grabs the toy. Sister B tries her best not to let go of the toy and this made her brother cry.

What I did: I talked to the little boy and told him to get another toy. He's in a stage where he wants to get anything he likes. This happens most of the times. I sometimes let my boy get what he wants, but when I say no, it's final. I just let him cry.

--Fighting over a toy is one of the most common reasons why siblings fight. I experience it everyday, and honestly, I'm beginning to get used to it. I try my best to be patient as possible, to be calm, even if I'm bombarded with other responsibilities at home. In the end, I just explain things to them and let them be emotional about it. Maybe they'll cry for 5 minutes or even more, and again, I will just let them. I've realized that if I will always give in with what they want, what will happen when they grow up?

Parents should never get tired of explaining things to their children. Time is really the most precious gift to give them. When we listen and talk to them, we are already making most of our time for them. Even at our busiest, let's make it a point to be with them at their happiest and most emotional/loudest crying moments. Kids grow up fast and I'm happy that i'm not missing anything so far:)

The Sweetest Things

I appreciate thoughtfulness a lot. I have always expected my husband to be thoughtful, but of course, he's the complete opposite. But I still love him anyway. I have realized that love isn't always about giving in to what others expect of you. Over the past few days, upon my conversations with different people, all of them have told me how lucky I am to have my husband. As I pondered on these, I've realized that I have failed and ignored what has been in front of me for a long time--I have married a very loving husband.

Below are some of the great things he has done for me. Sharing love and good vibes to all, please read on:

1. When I was pregnant with our first child, he took it upon himself to assist me in anyway that he can to accomplish what I needed to do before my comprehensive exams. He talked to the professors and borrowed books on my behalf. Even going to school with me and waiting for me inside the library.

2. He made sandwiches for me. He would wake up early in the morning to give me my 'baon' for work. 

3. He would make my coffee and prepare my breakfast. As I always have succeeding classes, he would make sure that I would be able to grab my favorite mug while working.

4. He would take his day off even if it was not really his day off. When I go out with friends, he would not go to work, and he would look after the kids. He allows me because he knows how difficult it is to just stay home and do everything.

5. He would cook for me. I remember craving for 'guinataan halu-halo'. He bought all that he needed for it and cooked with gusto. 

more soon:)

What I Need to Do

Christmas is fast approaching. When one has kids, it becomes the most anticipated event of the year. I now have this sense of urgency to plan something special for the kids. They're expecting Santa Claus to come for their gifts. And somehow I've realized to do these things soon:

1. Decorate the house. We only have a small Christmas tree, but despite that, I think I should add more decorations for the home. Kids are happy to see decors in different forms and colors. I am actually thinking of DIY project for the kids. Sounds exciting.

2. De-clutter. I think one of the most important things to do before the holidays is to get rid of clutter. Kids will soon have new toys and books, and old toys will soon be ignored. Easier said than done! But i'll try:)

3. Prioritize. It's cliche to include 'SAVE UP' in my list. During Christmas, expenses double and no matter how hard we compute it, it'll end up most probably negative. I think parents should learn to prioritize. It is already a given for kids to ask for anything they want, plus the fact that we also want something for the house or for ourselves. Nevertheless, I think prioritizing what we need to buy over what we like or want for now would make a big difference in our wallets.

What are your plans for the coming weeks? Goodluck!

I Need a Lift

What make a person happy? We are happy because of our family, career, money, friends, etc. Definitely a lot of answers, right? However, let's admit it that there are days when we feel down. Life isn't fair after all. So what do you do to put a smile on your face? Below are some of the simple things that I do to get that needed lift.

1. Christmas songs. While writing this article, I am listening to a medley of Christmas songs because it lifts my mood. I get to sing along with it. It reminds me of good memories and love. Some may even agree that a Christmas song brings a positive vibe. It brings the warmth of close family relationships and friendships.

2. 'I love yous'. After a day or even in the middle of doing a chore, I usually get stressed to the point of crying. An example would be cleaning and arranging my living room so that I could comfortably sit on, but then kids start to disarrange everything again and turns the room into a mess. What follows would most probably be a shouting/scolding parent and kids who'd just run around and ignore me. I experience that every day. It gets quite tiring and depressing but when a kid suddenly hugs you and says 'I love you', the anger just disappears like nothing happened. Same thing happens when I just cook the food they like or give them their favorite juices. Kids have this unexplained source of charm that turns everything positive.

3. Writing. There's something therapeutic about it. I used to have a lot of journals before, but for some reason, I have lost it, or maybe I should just do some thorough cleaning of the house soon. One of the main reasons why I write is because I want my children to be reminded of the lessons that I want to instill in them. When kids are too young, they have many questions. Even if a parent tries his best to answer them, kids may not still understand them. One of the first things I've written about in my new journal is about my career path.

4. Conversations. Isn't uplifting when you have that one person who'll listen to you without judging you? When I recently had a falling out with a friend, I really felt bad about it. My husband was there to listen to me, I think that was just enough to make me feel better.

Safety at Home

Parents will always protect their children. Having three kids meant divided time and attention. However, I make sure that I don't compromise their safety. But then there are days when we, parents, thought we've done our best to guard our children. When I recently encountered an 'unsafe entity' outside my house, I became disappointed with myself. I even asked myself, 'why wasn't I able to stop it?'. I got depressed and just kept on blaming myself. After that, life moves on and I didn't have any choice but to protect them even more. Here's what I do to ensure safety at home:

1. I don't sleep. Yes, I still watch my children sleep. Ever since I started having a child, I was deprived of sleep. I only have an average of 5 hours of sleep everyday. I seldom have naps, but when I do, it's just for 20 minutes. One will never know when trouble comes, so I choose to be awake.

2. I lock the doors and the gate. Strangers, sometimes, have their own creative ways of letting themselves in other people's houses. I make sure I lock the gate of my house all day. It prevents my kids from going out. I still allow them to run around outside, but not all the time.

3. I set rules. I always remind my kids of the rules that I always want them to remember. They should be inside the house at 5pm. They should inform me of anything suspicious. They should not talk or go with other children to other places. Yes, a lot of 'shoulds'. But despite that, I make sure I explain everything to them.

4. I trust my kids. Although I set a lot of rules at home, I sometimes allow my kids to do what they want, checking whether they apply my reminders or not. I want to give them a little independence and a sense of responsibility. I want to see if they will still do the right thing even if I'm not looking.

5. I talk to my kids. One of the most important things in a child-parent relationship is communication. Kids have a lot of questions in their minds, specially when there are rules and limitations to adhere to. One of the best thing a parent can do is to spare time explaining what might happen if their kids break the rules. Also, be honest to your kids, so that they would reciprocate. Do not sugar coat things to the point of missing out on reality. Remember, when your kids grow up, the lessons you taught them will make them ready to face the world.

REVIEW: Unionbank Dasmarinas, Cavite

My Unionbank Eon will expire in a few days, so I've got to replace it in time for my salary at the end of the month. At 9am on the dot, the Unionbank branch in Dasmarinas, Cavite opened up. Here are some things I've noticed:

1. Their bank employees, including the guard, do not know how to greet customers. Courtesy is very important because the life of their business depends on the customers.

2. My transaction only took 15 minutes. Kinda quick but it would have been quicker if the person in charge in handling new accounts did not include her other responsibilities not related to my purpose. She said she'd just open the vault. I went there to change my Eon card, so no connection at all.

3. I paid P150 for the replacement of my Eon card. I've read in numerous blogs that a fee is paid for the replacement. Apparently, there is no payment if the card has reached beyond its expiration date. For example, if my card expires at the end of August and I decide to replace it by September, there would be no charge for replacing it. It would have been better if the bank's website includes that information.

More observations next week as my card will be replaced after a week.

REVIEW: Sky Ranch

Last August 23, our whole family decided to celebrate my father's 70th birthday at Sky Ranch. It is located beside Taal Vista in Tagaytay. Buses going to Nasugbu, Batangas pass by it, and jeepneys from Tagaytay Rotunda are another option. Below are my negative and positive observations:

1. Their entrance is 80 pesos during weekends. I find it misleading because when I told the cashier that we have a senior citizen, she said that the entrance of my father will still be 80 pesos because it is already discounted. According to her, the entrance is really 100. I think that is a lame excuse not to give a senior citizen discount. So it appears that regardless of a guest's age, the entrance would still be P80.

2. Even if it's sunny or drizzling, the ride attendants are always ready to use their big umbrellas for those who will be taking their rides. 

3. Children below a certain height has a free entrance. However, I ended up paying for my 3-year old daughter's rides because the cashier said she isn't free. When my brother-in-law asked, he was told that a child who has a free entrance can also avail of free rides all throughout. How confusing!

4. It's nice to see that there are now benches around. When my friends and I first visited, we were just standing around.

My kids enjoyed their time at Sky Ranch. Aside from the entrance and price issues, the place is clean and the attendants are nice.

What I Am Proud Of

I've been a little depressed these past weeks, but suddenly had a change of perspective. The sudden change was unexplainable. So I would like to write about what I am proud of. This article includes my big and not-so-big accomplishments as a wife and mother. Happy reading!

1.I am proud of witnessing my children's milestones. 

When a mother works outside, she misses a lot. Although the work contributed by women nowadays are given more worth compared before, nothing beats seeing your child's first smile or first step. I had a child one after another, but despite that, I never missed any of their milestones. It never stops to make me smile when I think about them.

2. I am proud of knowing my husband more.

I always tell my husband that our relationship is tested by distance. In the 9 years that we have been together as a couple, 3 years of that, he stayed in Japan, 1 year he stayed in Qatar, he goes home only twice a week because his work is in Makati, and going home everything would exhaust his time, money and energy. I admit that even when we got married, we still didn't know a lot about each other. Our relationship grew as we were blessed with more children. That meant having a limited time with only the two of us. Both of us exerted a lot of effort to make each other feel special. It was a challenge at first but we were able to surpass it. Yes, it was difficult but worth it.

3. I am proud of my work.

When I was studying my master's degree in UP, I was ashamed of my job. Whenever I was asked what my job is, I would get blank stares from others. I felt that other people think my work wasn't that serious to be considered a career. I guess partly true. I've been working as an ESL teacher since 2005. Ever since quitting my job in 2009 and becoming a housewife after, I was left with no choice but to look for a job that would be easy to do at home. Still, ESL teaching came as a good opportunity. I am more proud of it now because I do not need to leave my house but still get a salary that is the same as those working outside.

4. I am proud of my little home.

I could still remember the time when I was questioned why I bought and used my husband's money for a 26.8 studio unit. I could still remember my mother-in-law's reaction upon seeing the unit, looking a for staircase (of course there was no staircase!). They made me feel I just wasted a lot of money for a small property. I had to let it all pass at that time. I am vindicated now. That small house witnessed my family's struggles and happiness for 4 years. 

5. I am proud of being a housewife.

Being a housewife and accepting that I have become a housewife were both difficult in the beginning. It was sad comparing myself to my peers and seeing how successful they have become in their chosen fields. I remembered saying that I wanted to be a housewife, but I wasn't ready with the responsibilities included. God listened to what I wanted to become and everything changed. It was disappointing at first. Doing everything on my own and still taking care of the children after was physically, mentally, and emotionally draining. But I have gotten used to it and couldn't last a day not doing a task for any of my family. 

6. I am proud of my children.

Last, but definitely not the least. I love my children so much because they complete me. They're like ordinary kids, but they're special to me. They are different in their own ways. They have their own strengths and shortcomings. They make me cry and they make me smile. When I look at them, I always think they're still babies. Even if I had a lot of difficult time taking care of them when they were smaller, I don't want them to grow up fast. 

What's Happening To Me?

dreamstime.com

I've been excited about so many things. From a whining person a month ago, something strange happened, and things are becoming clearer. I recently realized the value of having an insurance. I'm a person who's afraid of dying. I don't want my kids to suffer what my sisters and I have experienced when our mother died. We were left with a million worth of debt, unpaid mortgages, credit cards, etc. My poor father have to shoulder everything. I used to blame my mother for what we have to go through after her death. Our lives were changed, every member in the family was affected. These past few days have made me realized how bad I was to blame my dead mother for our financial problems. I suddenly realized that she was not financially literate. She didn't realize the importance of investing when she was still alive. I still love her despite what happened. Somehow, things would have been better if we knew people who could give a good influence about money.

Last weekend, I met two different agents. Both were knowledgeable about their products. Agent 1 started discussing about my finances and what could be left after deducting expenses from our salaries. Agent 2 started discussing about the background of the company. Agent was straightforward in what she could offer. Agent 2 provided me with enough information about the different technical terms associated with finances. For the value of a VUL worth 350k, Agent 1's quarterly premium is double of Agent 2's. I still have to research on their respective products. I asked for a month to think about it before making a decision.

Aside from being more financially-concerned and interested these days, I also decided to change my hair color. Being a housewife has decreased my confidence. I lost interest in going out and learning new things. I became content with my kids and what I need to do at home. I somehow lost my motivation to grow and learn as an individual. Parenthood has put me in a cage where everything I do becomes a chore. I love what I do for my husband and kids, but somehow, I lost 'it'. And so I decided to change something about myself.

To end this, I just want to say that I started to think of the future because I was holding on so long to the past. Change is good.

notbuyinganything.blogspot.com

My Typical Day

                                           Source: imnmarketer.com

What is your typical day like? As a mother of 3 kids, with no nanny, and a lot of house chores to do, I end up lacking energy all the time. Did I mention that I also work? I have realized that ever since I had a child, I have never had a complete 8-hour sleep. I could only have at most 5 hours of sleep everyday. Let me give you a list of what goes on everyday.

4:15am -Wake up and prepare for my 4:30am class
4:30am-6:20am- Online classes
6:20-6:40am- Prepare kirsten for school
6:40-7:00- Breakfast
7-7:40- Do laundry
7:40-7:50- Bathe kurt
7:50-8:00- Prepare for a one-hour online class, do the dishes, etc
8:00-9:00 Online classes
9:00-9:40 Prepare kylie for school, do the laundry in between, prepare what will be cooked for lunch
9:40-10:00 Send kylie to school, fetch kirsten *with kurt in tow
10:00-10:20 Check kirsten's homeworks, check for subjects to review, do the laundry
10:20-11:30 Prepare and cook lunch, wait for kylie to arrive, put kurt for a nap
11:30-12:00 Lunch, do the dishes, etc.
3:00-5:00pm Clean the house, do more dishes, review the kids' lessons, prepare and cook dinner
5:30 Dinner
6:00-6:30 Bathe the kids
from 7:00pm Check my night classes, emails, writing jobs
7:30 Put the kids to sleep
9:00-10:00pm Online classes
----------------------------------------------------------

I could only take a nap in the afternoon, but most of the times I couldn't because I got used to watching them sleep. I would often complain about this schedule but I am more than thankful for the physical and emotional strength everyday. I also break down in tears sometimes, specially when kids become uncontrollable and they just won't listen. I've thought before of going back to work outside, but just an hour of being away and not seeing my kids become unbearable already. I've learned to appreciate the hardship of doing everything everyday and find something positive about it. The kids' smiles, words of appreciation and warm hugs compensate for everything.

7 New Faces in 7 Days

                                                         Source: cavendishimaging.com
I am slowly becoming a fan of Solar News Channel because of their shows. 'Undercover Boss' is my favorite show, because it features how bosses are willing to go undercover to know the problem and issues of their own companies, deal with the employees who serve as the backbone of their companies, and later on uncover their real identities to these people and reward them in the end. Last Saturday, as I was channel surfing, I chanced upon 'Stories', a documentary show on the Solar News Channel. The story that night was about how a group of UK doctors went to Vietnam, more specifically Danang Hospital, to help those who have facial deformities. The medical team will only be staying in Vietnam for 7 days and they need to help 7 patients with serious facial deformities. The challenge for these doctors was choosing who to help among the many number of patients expecting to be cured. I never knew that many people in Vietnam have facial deformities. They have, i think, one of the highest number of people with birth defects. The lack of medical help and equipment have forced these same people to just accept their fate. What made it worse was poverty. It made me feel very lucky and sad at the same time. Lucky because no one in my family has a similar problem. Sad because the usual problems of not having money and not getting the right medical help are forcing these people to accept their situation. What impressed me in the end was the idea of bringing 3 patients to London for their operation and treatment. 

The viewer will, in the beginning, be saddened by the plight of these patients. Making one realize that, in our society, we still laugh upon those who do not look 'normal' or 'acceptable' based on what most of us have made standards. That even if we have started to accept black as beautiful, we are not still ready to accept those whose faces are deformed. That even if most of us say that we put no discrimination on people on wheelchairs, we still pass them in elevators, and some companies still do not employ them. Despite these realizations, one compelling lesson is unforgettable all throughout: that one should not lose hope even if the odds may go against him most of the times. 

Have a long distance relationship?

A long distance relationship is never easy, but if I'd be given a chance to do it all over again, I would. I met my husband in 2004 and he also left before the year ended. You see, we met in March and he left November. He came back after three years, to be exact, November 2007. During the 3 years, we relied on yahoo messenger, numerous phone calls and letters. Well, during the entire 3 years, I only received 1 letter from him. Despite that, I never grew tired of writing him, and sending him letters 3 times a month. I remember I would frequently go to the Post Office inside the University of the Philippines. Yes, those were the days. It was very difficult because it seemed back then that I had an imaginary boyfriend. It was hard to cling to promises. What made it harder was the fact that we were just in the beginning of our relationship when he left, just 6 months. It was a risk. There were times when I had to initiate breakups, but he never said 'yes'. Sure there were disagreements, but they were signs of how we miss each other.

                                                             Source: fitting-it-all-in.com

I think most long distance relationships fail because couples can't stand not seeing each other, as if the presence of each other is the only thing that will make their relationship stronger. It's true that physical presence is important, but when you enter a long distance relationship, you have to look for other ways to compensate physical absence. I still didn't know how I did it, or how I surpassed it. Maybe I just grew tired of not seeing him anymore. I made a conscious effort of writing him, almost everyday. I was not able to send the other letters that I wrote him, but writing to him seemed like I was writing in my diary during those days. It became a habit. And that habit beat the idea of not seeing him.

When someone decides to pursue a long distance relationship, be prepared to get hurt and don't expect a lot. Always consider what is important for each other. You have your own priorities when you're apart. Do not expect the other person to give in to your demands all the time. Remember, both of you have your own lives, your own responsibilities to fulfill and goals to pursue, Be understanding. Be prepared to understand even if it seems difficult to do so. During those 3 years, he was working for his family and I was pursuing my studies. We both have different priorities, but we never considered the difference as a hindrance to our relationship. Though there were times that I wished he was with me during special occasions, we had to let them all pass because there are more important things to focus on.

The question: 'Do I want to lose this person?' is something that I end up asking myself after thinking of how difficult it is to be in a long distance relationship. When I thought I could not wait anymore and got tired of waiting for phone calls and messages, I ask myself this question. The answer was always a 'no'. Most couples lose their faith in each other during long distance relationships. Time and distance will always pose a challenge in what you have and in what you have built together, but I guess the idea of losing each other would change everything and turn what you have in its original place. 

I've always believed that 'Patience is a virtue'. Do not be tired of waiting.

Customer Service Experience from Jollibee: Pass or Fail?

I recently availed of Jollibee's 45-minute delivery. I usually call them twice a month specially when I feel like rewarding my kids from being behaved and obedient. You see, my kids' faces lighten up when I order from them. I also do this when I can't cook anymore because of my hectic schedule. Talking to their customer service for order taking only takes 2 or 3 minutes, and then after that, the 45-minute wait begins. However, our food arrived an hour later. Jollibee promises P200-worth of gift certificates if they failed to bring the food on time. Since my food arrived late, I expected to get the gift certificates (GCs). However, the rider told me that the 45-minute rule starts when they, the riders, leave the store. I told him that I clarified that to the customer service already. But he still didn't give me the GCs. He even told me that the P200 value of the GCs will be deducted to their salaries. I think he said that to make me feel guilty. So I asked him to sign at the back of the receipt with the delivery time included. I told him that I'd be waiting for their call to address the problem. After he left, I called and clarified the information. I didn't wait for the call from the store manager because I'm not really sure if the rider would talk about my complaint to the manager. The customer service that I first talked to transferred my call to their supervisor. She was a bit surprised of the information that the rider gave me. She told me that she will verify the reason about the problem to the Manager-on-duty of that particular Jollibee store. She even told me that their company would never deduct from the employees salary. After a few minutes, she called me back to once again apologize about what had happened and assured me that proper information will be disseminated next time to the employees. And yes, she told me that the GCs will be delivered to me before the day ends:)

How to make a child ready for school

                                                             Source: pyambr.com

A child is no longer a baby when he/she starts schooling. I have two preschool girls that just started their classes last week. The eldest's schedule is from 7:00am-10:00am, while the other is from 10:00am-12:00nn. I consider myself lucky because my kids never cried or threw a tantrum on their first day of school. I guess it is still normal for kids to be fearful of a new environment, specially on their own. This is why I understand the difficulty of other parents and children who cry in schools. My kids have already adjusted to their morning schedule. They usually wake up at around 5:00am because of my work, have breakfast, brush teeth and take a bath. It's been a breeze so far because I remind them every night of what they should do in the morning. These are only some of the reasons why I think my children are ready for school. Let me share more of my observations:

1. Kids should be taught how to be responsible.

Going to school for the first time is a big adjustment for both parents and children. In my case, early on, I've been constantly reminding my children that since we have no helper to depend on, they have got to understand the importance of being responsible. It's not an easy task in the beginning. There even came a point when I have to keep on repeating my reminders everyday, getting blank reactions from them. Others may think that I may be expecting a lot from my kids, but I have always believed how kids are intelligent in understanding and seeing the difficulties around them. 

2. Kids should be taught the value of time.

It is never easy to wake up in the morning, specially for kids. Kids love to play even until way past their bedtimes. However, it is important for parents to instill the importance of time and being on time by cultivating the things that their kids need to do during specific times of the day. When a child gets used to doing something on a regular basis, it becomes a habit. Later on, the child would then initiate doing what he needs to do even if he is not reminded. 

3, Kids should be taught the value of learning.

Kids are naturally inquisitive. They may ask anything they see on tv, outside of their houses, or just anything in their wonderful minds. I believe that learning should be nurtured more by giving utmost attention to our children. When we listen to them, they feel that they are given importance. Whatever their stories may be, their little minds really have a lot going inside. When kids are exposed to songs, nursery rhymes, reading and playing, parents may discuss how similar activities can also be experienced in school, with new found friends. With this, a kid understands that similar activities are not only confined to the colorful walls of their houses, but can also be enjoyed in schools.

How was your child's first day of school?:)